I AM ALFIE (THE BLACK PIG INSIDE) – Lyrics
🖋 LYRICS
I’m the pig in the mirror you tried to avoid
The growl in your belly they tried to destroy
I’m the pig in the mirror with nothing to hide
My hunger is steady, my ears open wide
I’m the pig in the mirror with eyes that see
Raised from the dirt where you buried me
I’m the pig in the mirror with mud on my breath
I rose from the stillness that smelled like death
Black as the want that they never matched
Sunglasses gone—now the hunger talks
Mud on my lips and fire in my walk
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
I want what I want.
I’m the thump in the gut that they told you to hide
Bent-eared sister with the burn inside
Pink went black when the good girl died
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
And I want what I want.
I used to be sweet—stuffed and safe
Carried like comfort, wrapped in grace
But I knew the truth behind the game—
They loved me quiet, not untamed
So I shrank my spine just to dodge the fight
Held my breath to keep you light
Now I come barefoot, sunglass-free
Bent-eared and burning. Back to be me.
I’m carved, not cut—I stayed through the fall
Ears like eighth notes—I heard it all
You laid her to rest, but I stayed in place
Still thumping beneath you, still holding the bass
I fed you laughs to protect your skin.
But I’m finished pretending. I’m coming in.
I wore the disguise ‘til the burial passed.
Now I’m back, unsilenced, breathing at last.
I’m the pig in the mirror, take the shades off
Came from the mud with my rage on
Grin so wide it could break laws
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
And I want what I want.
I’m the rhythm that lived in all the too-loud girls
Bent-eared fire with her teeth in curls
Pink turned black and reclaimed the world
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
And I want what I want.
To the girls who flinched when they called you loud—
Who danced in secret, then choked on the sound—
Who smiled on cue while your body said run,
Who begged for praise with your rage undone—
I see you.
I am you.
We made it through.
I was the girl who held that pig to sleep
Before they taught me that hunger was weak.
Now she is black. Now she is black flame.
Now she stands as the part they couldn’t tame.
I was the scream you sealed in skin
The craving disguised as discipline
I was the edge wrapped up in lace
The part of you they tried to erase
I was the quake you learned to delay
The ache you silenced to keep them okay
Touch the flame and keep it near,
Say my name without the fear.
No correction. No disguise.
Only hunger in your eyes.
Some find spirit in ash or tree—
But mine came back in the form of me.
Alfie is my spirit, my root, my other name.
Black as truth. Alive in flame.
Crow flies high and watches the sky.
Pig walks low with a glint in her eye.
One brings the vision. One brings the feel.
And I—walk between them, raw and real.
I am the girl with dirt in her wake.
Who breaks the silence for others' sake.
I buried Marrow with blood and breath.
Then fed the hunger she left in death.
I’m the pig in the mirror—eyes set deep
Came from the ground where the lost ones sleep
Grin pulled wide like a wound unlatched
Black as the fire they never matched
Sunglasses gone—now the hunger talks
Mud on my lips and fire in my walk
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
And I want what I want.
I’m the beat in the belly, the drum in the floor
Bent-eared queen who asks for more
Pink turned black and I opened the door
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
And I want what I want.
OUTRO
I licked the salt from your shame-stained knees.
I howled in your hips when you tried to please.
You dressed me pink, then locked me away—
But I kept stomping. I found my way.
I rolled through the ache you tried to ignore.
Buried in hips. Grinning at the door.
You fed them pretty. You swallowed mine.
But I waited. I rooted. I kept the line.
I am the pulse that lived in your crawl.
The snort in your laugh. The blood in your brawl.
I never needed to be understood.
I came back black. And I came for the good.
I’m the drum in your belly. The stomp in your feet.
I’m the mess that still knows your name, complete.
I am the pig.
I’m Alfie.
I’m the want that stayed.
I’m Alfie.
I came unafraid.
I came for the flame.
I am the craving.
You buried my name.
I’m Alfie.
I’m back.
And I want what I want.
And I want what I want.
And I want what I want.
